I overheard the tall kid asking my roommate a question today, "What do you think DC thinks about when he is pretending to take a nap?" Of course, my roommate didn't have an answer. But then again, he's an idiot. Since I like the tall kid, however, and since I am impressed that my squinting trick did not fool the tall kid into believing that I was actually asleep, I have decided to reveal some of the things that I thought about today while I was squinting.
1. When is the short curly haired girl going to pour something on me?
2. What is the purpose of wind chimes? They are quite annoying.
3. Why does the short kid with glasses change his clothes every time he walks into a different room of the house?
4. What can I eat?
5. How do telephones work?
6. I should lose about 15 pounds.
7. What can I eat?
8. Can flip-flops really get stuck in the top of an escalator thereby pulling your foot between the step and the platform subsequently severing your foot, or was Grandpa Roommate just jerking my chain?
9. Where in the hell is that short curly haired girl? It's too quiet in here.
10. Brian Williams has got nothing on Tom Brokaw.
11. If Barry Bonds did not use steroids, how come his head is as big as basketball now. I've seen his rookie card.
12. Miley Cyrus should fire her dad unless he agrees to bring back that dang mullet.
13. I'm hungry.
14. Why are they called dust "bunnies?"
15. Horatio Caine or Walker Texas Ranger?
16. That short curly haired girl is somewhere plotting my death.
17. Sigmund Freud's mom was probably distant and aloof.
18. Puppies suck.
19. George Clooney? Used to be on the Facts of Life? Really? George Clooney? Natalie and Tootie? Really? NO WAY!
20. Speaking of television, Grandma Roommate never liked Sanford and Son. How come?
21. I almost read a book today, but I fell asleep.
22. If you put a pork chop in your coat pocket, how long would it stay there before the smell would become unbearable?
23. "Cloister" is an irritating word. More so than "moist."
24. Teletubbies are satanic.
25. I've got to move. That short curly haired girl is coming. I just feel it.
Wow! How refreshing! Perhaps I'll do this more often. Revealing my random thoughts was quite a liberating experience.
One more thought -
26. Who came up with the idea for bread sticks?
Which reminds me . . .
27. I'm hungry.
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